Large Families: The Reality!

On hundred years ago families looked a lot different than they do today. There was usually a mom and a dad, and typically several children. Having 5 kids was on the smaller size. In today’s western society, however, the typical family generally consists of 4: two parents and two children. Sometimes you see more, sometimes you see less, but this “size 4” family size seems to be the most widely accepted by the rest of the public.

The question I have, is why? Why does everyone seem to think small families are the only acceptable form of families, and that large families are somehow detrimental to all individuals involved, leaving everyone destined to live a life of doom and regret?

In the following post I would like to look at the joys of large families, and the reality of what it actually looks like. I in no way am trying to say that large families are better than small families, since God chooses each family one member at a time, but I would like to try and diminish some of the myths that go along with big families. I have interviewed 2 young ladies who grew up in a family of 10, a mother who raised 7 children, and myself, currently raising 5 children with the anticipation of more.

Why don’t we start and get some of the stereotypical things out of the way first, some of the “challenges” of raising large families. The one I struggle with the most, as do several mothers of large families that I know, would be laundry. Laundry is like that magical beast that cannot be beaten. No sooner have I conquered the giant mound, taunting me from the top of the stairs, does a new mound stand waiting for me, ready to strike. So long as I have young children still at home I am pretty sure I will continually loose the laundry battle.  Household chores can be another challenge, although not as bad as you might think. A supportive and helpful husband, paired with daily chores for each child, keep most things in check. Do I have a sparkling, catalogue ready house? No. Often there are days where I clean up the entire house 3 times over, and it still resembles the aftermath of a bomb, but at the end of the days everything is put away, bathrooms are kept clean, and kitchens are wiped and clear of clutter. Come to my house at 10pm at night and we will be ready to entertain :)  Another challenge for some families, although not all, is finances. With 5 kids and counting, food bills can get a bit high, clothing is grown out of quickly, extra-curricular sports add up, and a simple night at the movies with the entire family can cost upwards of $100. I would consider these 3 of our biggest challenges of such a large family and perhaps a few more tantrums than the average home, but overall these would be our biggies.

I have heard comments before, countless number of times, that raising large families somehow leaves the children at a disadvantage. I would like to argue that it instead simply changes our priorities. Can we go to Disneyland every single year? Or take our kids out to dinner every single week? Or buy them every single item their hearts desire? No, of course not. If that is what is important to you, then perhaps a large family would be considered detrimental.

With large families, you instead have to change your priorities to what is important. I somehow don’t think my children are going to grow up lacking in character or happiness because they didn’t get to go to Disneyland 15 times. We try and do family camping trips instead, often with family friends. As one of the young ladies I interviewed remarked,

“When we went on family vacations we would do stuff like go camping, we would never go on big trips out of the country or anything. But truthfully I have a lot of great memories from those trips so I don’t remember ever feeling like I was missing out.”

For us family restaurant visits are kept to once every one or two months and hand-me-downs are an essential. Our younger kids look forward to the hand-me-downs, eager to wear their big brother’s cool clothes, and restaurant visits become a special and treasured outing, not to be taken for granted. The mother to 7 children that I interviewed put it this way:

“We've had to make choices about what's important to us, and what we felt like we could afford to spend our time/money on, so maybe they've been less involved in team sports or music lessons than the typical North American kids, because those activities weren't a priority to us.  But, then again, I'd say that the kids who are constantly scheduled and chauffeured from activity to activity are missing out on just being home and playing with other kids.

We also make a priority of one-on-one time with each child. Some days that might mean a specific child gets to go to the store with mommy or daddy, or perhaps help Dad do a special task in the yard. Other days it might mean a fun trip to the ice-cream store. We also spend individual time each and every night praying with each child, reading books, and tucking them into bed. Bed-times are staggered most evenings, allowing important time with each child. Snuggles are done on levels, with a child snuggling on either side, and one child on top of your lap in the middle. No child in our home is ever left out and gets constant attention.  Another one of my family participant’s states:

 “My parents spent time with us by helping with our homework each night, always made sure that we had a good day, and sometimes mom or dad would take us out one at a time on bike rides for quality time. Mom and Dad also loved taking us on camping trips in the summer time; it was an awesome family bonding time.”

The most common comment I received from the ladies I interviewed, was how valuable large families were to them, and how they always had a best friend nearby. Family became more than just family to these kids, they became friends. Laughter is a guarantee every single day and support is always a question away.

"There's never a dull moment! Sometimes "family rate" means a great deal for us! It's never lonely or boring. Our kids learn great social skills, from getting to know (and get along with) all of their siblings, with all of their different personalities."

 Of everyone I interviewed, they all said they would either have a large family all over again, or themselves grow up and have a large family as well. Clearly the benefits far outweigh the negatives, and as you can see a large family, while challenging, is still a family more than capable of all the same love and attention smaller families have too. I would like to leave you with some positive attributes to large families that I complied from several other blogs. Enjoy!

 Happy situations are more festive, more people to comfort you in times of need

 Children become better equipped to handle social situations after experiencing many different personalities from siblings

 There’s never a shortage of something funny to tell someone. Many people go through their day without a single funny thing that happens to them. I have at least a 25 percent chance of funny just by getting out of bed every day.

There is always someone to help me out. Even when the hubs is at work at night, I have at least one extra pair of arms to help clean up, chase, or even hold someone down when necessary.

Leftovers in my house are almost nonexistent.

In the middle of winter, little people climb into bed with me keep me warm.

My house never feels empty.

I always have an excuse to watch cartoons.

Even their normal squabbles and spats, when refereed by parents, teach them lessons of fairness, sharing, splitting differences, letting others off the hook, forgiving and forgetting. This fortifies their moral standards, their lifelong conscience. (Friction, though irksome and tedious at times, has its uses; it rounds off rough edges, forms a smooth, resilient surface.)

Since their parents take care of their needs but cannot satisfy their whims (through lack of money and time), children learn the difference between wants and needs. They learn to wait for what they want, or to work and earn it themselves. Thus they are spared the corruptive influence of instant gratification. They internalize the virtues of patience and honorable ambition. They grow to become self-reliant self-starters.

Through interactions with their siblings, children more deeply understand gender differences. From their sisters, boys understand and appreciate femininity; from their brothers, girls understand and appreciate what's common among males. All the children are thus better prepared for marriage.

One of the mysteries of a large family is the startling differences siblings display in temperaments and talents and interests. By dealing with these differences among their siblings, children learn to get along with anyone. Having to share a bedroom and bathroom and space at the table prepares the children superbly for marriage and for life.

Older children play with the youngest ones, and thus form a bond of affection with them. Younger children receive love and learning from several older people, not just their parents. So older children are pulled out of their egos, and younger ones are surrounded by love.

Each child journeys through life enjoying the support of his grown-up brothers and sisters. No matter what befalls them in life, your children will never be alone. Indeed, the finest gift parents can give their children, the gift lasting a lifetime, is their brothers and sisters.

The next adventure...

I have always had a particular unofficial agreement with God. In fact I have repeatedly thanked Him that He has never asked me to travel for His works. I have been happily serving him in my wonderful comfort zone of Canada and the US for as long as I can remember. In fact I joke about it to my husband all the time. We foster, adopt, run orphan ministries, all things I can do from the comfort of my own Country. It just so happens that I am not a fan of ethnic food, REALLY not a fan of bugs, kind of a germ phobic so DEFINITELY not a fan of public bathrooms…or strange bathroom set ups.  But above all else, I am TERRIFIED of flying. I even pondered adopting from a different country just so that I wouldn’t have to fly (some countries fly the children out to you). So there you have it, I have been comfy cozy with where God had me (I think that is the problem right there isn’t it!).

This past year I have started following an amazing blog www.nogreaterjoymom.com The author is an adoptive mother and astounding advocate for adoptions; special needs adoptions to be exact. Many of her posts have to do with children in the Ukraine, Bulgaria, and Eastern Europe in general where special needs children remain in orphanages wasting away.  By the age of 4 or 5 they are transferred to mental institutions where they live out the rest of their lives, no touch, no stimulation, and definitely no love. Many of them have minor special needs yet so many of them deteriorate to almost nothing from lack of resources, food, and neglect.

Myself and a few friends recently started the process of opening a Christian adoption agency. While we plan on facilitating adoptions from anywhere, foster care and international special needs adoptions will be our focus, with significantly reduced fees making adoptions more accessible. My heart is to see the very children in these Eastern European countries come home to their forever families. I figured this would involve setting up connections in those countries and merely facilitating adoptions.

Man was I ever wrong! A couple of weeks ago I woke up and immediately felt God telling me that I needed to go to Bulgaria. That was kind of strange as God had never asked anything like this of me before, and he knew our unofficial deal…didn’t He?  I immediately tried to pass the buck off on my husband and asked him if he might be interested in going. He of course was, as he loves to travel, yet as I asked him it felt wrong somehow. I had never experienced these feelings before. I had never had any sort of inkling towards travelling anywhere! I started to argue with God. “Come on now, really? Me? Are you SURE?”

But he kept coming back with the same answer that it was ME who was supposed to go to Bulgaria. Since then I have been a bit freaking out. I wake up in the mornings terrified and ready to call the entire thing off, then by the afternoon I am excited and researching hotels and country information etc. I have been on a major emotional roller coaster! Yet deep down, past all my irrational fears, I feel confidant and excited for what this trip will bring! I will be going down the first week of September with a small team from our agency where we will spend a week traveling around Bulgaria visiting the various orphanages filled with special needs children, forging relationships and having our Hearts broken for what already breaks God’s. I am hoping to come home changed and even more on fire to advocate for these precious and forgotten children that so desperately need a home! Until then I think some antacid might be in order J

If you are interested in seeing a video series of what life is like for these children please click here.

Do you want a FREE IPAD2??

Hi everyone!! We are looking to build up our adoption fund since our Jamaican adoption is moving along and we need a good chunk of money coming up soon to send our dossier out. I have decided to do a giveaway! This is how it will work. Go to my blog and on the right hand-side you will see our chip-in. Donate a minimum of $20 and you will be entered into the giveaway. Come back and comment on this post that you have donated so that I can keep track of who donated (you do not need to say how much). This is the part that I am relying on your genoristy for...the giveaway unfortunately can only happen IF we receiv a minimum of 50 donors, which hopefully shouldn't be hard at all! You can keep track on the comments of this post of how many people have donated. The model I am giving away is:  

  

iPad 2 with Wi-Fi + 3G 16GB - White

 

So Please help us bring our little one home! Multiple entries are allowed, simply comment each time you make a donation. I will keep this open until April 30th at 11pm, and that night by midnight I will make the draw! We thank everyone who is able to help us out, and looking forward to bringing our next child home!! Rememer, we can't do this without you!!

Dan and Amanda!

PS. DONT FORGET TO COMMENT BELOW ONCE YOU HAVE DONATED SO I KNOW TO INCLUDE YOU IN THE DRAW!

My Caffeinated God

Almost a year ago exactly, I wrote a blog post “Changing theWorld: One little step at a time.” It was all about taking small steps to accomplish something big in the name of God. When writing that post I had felt led to sign up for school to become a social worker, so that I might make changes in the lives of orphaned children. The article was about turning dreams into a tangible reality, and that very day I signed up for my first social work class. I had the expectation that I would chip away at it slowly and complete it sometime in the far future. I was excited, encouraged, but to be honest, I was a bit scared and a tiny bit doubtful. Part of me thought “How on earth am I going to do this? I have 5 kids, 3 with special needs, already run an orphan ministry and have a husband in school to become a firefighter!” I knew God was calling me to step-up, but I truly was a bit doubtful. At times, having 5 kids can be exhausting…truly exhausting. I trusted my Father though, and moved forward, unsure how exactly my future would unfold.

            Almost a year later, all I can say is God really DOES know what He is talking about. When He is the one in charge, the Holy Spirit steps in and amazing things are accomplished. My original though had been one course a semester, maybe even a year, depending on how I could handle it. Funny how I assumed it was me who would have to handle things (we all know who really handled it). Today, however, thanks to God’s amazing power, I am enrolled in school full-time, almost done my first year, have somehow maintained an A grade point average and am quickly on the way to finishing my degree in 3 more years. I often wonder how it all worked out so well. I am not a coffee drinker, have never even had a cup my entire life. Yet the way I have managed to somehow get through everything I have to get through is by staying awake long hours. I basically put my kids to bed at 7pm, and then spend from 7pm-midnight or later doing homework, folding laundry, working on ministry things and spending time with my hubby. By the time I go to bed it is about 12:30 or 1:00am in the morning, and then I wake up the next day at 6am. I should be exhausted. Prior experience has taught me that doing such ridiculous things would leave me unconscious and napping every day. Yet somehow, somehow I feel like I have all the caffeine in the world to get me through each day. I finally realized what that caffeine was. It was my God. My amazing, powerful, and all knowing God, who knew from the beginning that He would be the driving force behind what I do. After all, I am merely a tool for Him to use. God is my caffeine and the only reason I am able to do what I do.

            Here’s the real kicker. I reread my post from that day a year ago, and realized I had divulged one of those dreams you often don’t reveal to people, or don’t think will ever come true, like becoming a president, or opening an orphanage, or something that seems so unfathomable you feel silly even saying it. My dream had been to one day open an adoption agency, free of charge, to make adoptions more accessible. Well…as usual….me with my little faith, thought it nothing more than a pipe dream. But GOD knew it was a reality, He was planting a seed because He knew it would come to fruition one day SOON! Today, only 12 months later after having a tiny little dream which I thought would never amount to anything, I am actually in the process of opening up an adoption agency with a great bunch of people! It is an adoption agency with significantly reduced fees to make adoptions accessible to so many more people so that so many more children can find their forever home. All this because I took a step of faith, unsure of where it would lead me. Why am I telling you all of this? I am certainly not trying to say “look at everything I have done,” on the contrary; it is hard and extremely awkward for me to say these types of things. I instead say them to you to encourage you! For so many of you out there who have a dream, a dream you think might come true some day in the future, or maybe not at all, or have desired doing something but don’t think you can, or have the energy or time…I just want to say YOU can’t, but GOD CAN! God will give you unthinkable strength, unimaginable energy, and HE can be your caffeine! He can give you the passion and driving force to move mountains, if you only let Him. I hope this encourages you to take a step of faith and do something scary, uncomfortable, and unimaginable, and wait to be amazed by what follows!

New adoption agency on the horizon.....

Do you ever get so excited about something that you can't even sleep? I use to feel this way right before Christmas. Once I had kids I would still feel this way, excited to see my kids faces. Now, I can't wait to wake up because I am truly LOVING what I am doing!
A few months ago the only Christian adoption agency in our province closed down. It was such a sad day, as there was such a huge need for a Christian agency, and now there are only two remaining Christian agencies in all of Canada. Myself, along with some great members of our adoption support group, decided the need was too huge to ignore. After careful prayer and consideration, we have decided to open a Christian adoption agency!
It seems crazy I know, but somehow, amidst the craziness of it all, I have such a complete sense of calm. I know why too. It is because we are following the Lord and HE is the one in control. Whenever he is in control, you know things are going to be ok, and there is nothing to worry about! When people hear what we are doing they look at us like we are crazy. I am not sure why? All of the craziest events in the bible always turned out so well :) Then again, I'm sure people thought Mary was crazy when she said she..the virgin...was having a baby. I'm sure people thought Moses was crazy for wanting to take on the Pharoah, and people HAD to have thought Noah was crazy for wanting to build the arc. But God carried each of them through their journey's, and I am so incredibly EAGER to see where our journey leads.
This won't be your typical agency. We want to see change. We want to see children brought to their forever families. We want to see an increase in special needs adoptions. We want to see an increase in foster care adoptions, and we want to no longer see finances as a hurdle. If you would like to see how our agency is going to be different check it out here.
It will take a while before we are ready to open. We will be spending the next year preparing, setting up connections, and getting ready for a local, international and domestic adoption agency! If you live in the area please check out our page Home for Every Child Family Services and check out some of our upcoming fundraisers!
Thanks for everyone's continued support and we look forward to see many more children brought home to their forever families!

The Starfish Story

 

The Starfish StoryOriginal Story by: Loren Eisley

One day a man was walking along the beach when he noticed
a boy picking something up and gently throwing it into the ocean.

Approaching the boy, he asked, "What are you doing?"

The youth replied, "Throwing starfish back into the ocean. The surf is up and the tide is going out. If I don't throw them back, they'll die."

"Son," the man said, "don't you realize there are miles and miles of beach and hundreds of starfish? You can't make a difference!"

After listening politely, the boy bent down, picked up another starfish,
and threw it back into the surf. Then, smiling at the man, he said
"I made a difference for that one"

 

     I just wanted to share this story because I find it so inspiring. Time and time again I have heard people say "you can't save them all" or "what can I do?" This story reminds me that even if we can't save them all, we can change the life of someone, one by one. To the person whose life is being changed, it is HUGE! God says he knows every single hair on our head, every grain of sand, so doesn't He also care about every single soul? Step by step we can make a difference through our Faith in the Lord!

"The King will reply, 'I tell you the truth, whatever you did for one of the least of these brothers of mine, you did for me.'

Matthew 25.40

The Drama of Women

(Disclosure: I am not now, nor have I ever been, a professional or expert at anything I am about to say, simply my personal thoughts on a subject)

Has your husband every said something to you, nothing of any consequence, but because of the way he said it, you got upset? “You have a tone” you might say. I am pretty sure we all do it. Husbands, however, are safe. You are stuck with them forever regardless of what silly attitudes you might give them. Where I find the struggles arise, are women and their female friendships amongst each other.

I know so many women, including myself, who have been hurt, hurt someone else, or are just generally confused on the feelings of other women. I have come to realize a lot of things, many through trial and error, but this past year in my interpersonal communication class, we were taught that everyone has their own personal frame of reference. Due to everyone’s unique past and experiences, we each view things differently. For example, one person might consider the word ‘angry’ as no big deal, a daily word to express emotion. Another person, however, who was raised drastically different, might view the word ‘angry’ as very serious, the kind of word that is used when a friendship is on the rocks. The same word, yet with completely different meanings to each person. This can happen with so many things. We each have our own meanings for words, our own meanings for tones, and even for behaviors. I remember as a child my dad use to always tell cashiers that he was going to go home and beat us kids, then laugh. Well for some reason “beating” meant going home to play the tickle game. Basically the goal was to try and jump past my dad, and if you were caught, you got tickled. If you made it past, you danced in triumph! For years the term ‘beating’ was nothing major. To most other families, however, it could have meant something completely different and more severe.

What does this mean when it comes to our female friendships? I think it means we often think the worse when we really don’t need to. We all have our own pasts and histories that are just never brought into account, causing so much miscommunication. For example, in my life I have been through some extremely trying situations with my kids. As a foster parent and adoptive parent, safety as a family is much different than those with biological kids, everyone seems to have an opinion and several situations have put us in scary positions. Because of this past, something not everyone knows about, I react EXTREMELY sensitive to comments about my parenting, about our kids, or about our family. One wrong comment could cause me to close up and retreat back into a safety bubble. Not because I am mad at anyone or do not like them, but more of a protection mechanism. I was hurt badly and don’t want to hurt again.

Another common one for a lot of people is shyness. Many people automatically assume people are being rude or snobby because of lack of social interaction, when more often than not, that person is just shy! It does not necessarily reflect their personal opinions of any women involved in the current social situation! Another one I personally struggle with, all the time (and continually try to work on) is my confidence in friendships. Growing up we moved every year and a half, so all my relationships were short and did not go through the usual ups and downs that long term friendships went through. It messed me up pretty bad. Because of that, I now associate all the wrong things together. Not because I am crazy (at least I don’t think so), but because of my experiences. Now, if I ever think someone is mad at me, I automatically think they must not like me. If women in my social circles don’t invite me to things I assume they must hate me as a person. I am aware of this and try to consciously work through these feelings. How many other people are operating on similar frame of reference issues? How many people have I offended saying they look so big in their third trimester of pregnancy, because to me big means far along and a baby growing, but to them, big might mean fat? We automatically assume the meaning behind everything based on our own thoughts, and completely miss what is happening from the person sending the message in the first place. The result is a lot of drama between women.

                                                                                                        

At the end of the day though, especially in our Christian circles, I don’t think the majority of women are out there to intentionally hurt other women. I don’t believe we are all trying to hint at hidden meanings, or imply some downfall to each other’s way of doing things. Yes, these things do happen, but I don’t think it should be where we all go first when reacting to someone’s response or comments in life. We are all sisters in the Lord, and should be there for each other, not against each other, and I think we actually are more than any of us even realizes. Next time someone says or does something that hurts you, take a moment, and try to think of their real intentions or motives, and what hidden driving forces might be behind it all. These are just my personal, random thoughts, by someone who struggles A LOT with misconceptions. Just sharing my thoughts J

A history gone....

Growing up we moved every year and a half. I never lived anywhere longer...sometimes we moved even more often than that. They weren't just moves across town (although we did those too), they were moves across country, across oceans even! We moved to England, Toronto, Edmonton, Kelowna, Peachland, Westbank, Abbotsford, Mission, Langley, Oregon, Texas....I think that is it! Every year we would move and every year we would have to make new friends, new routines, new traditions. Every year I was the new girl. Every year I was ripped from the best friends I had just barely made. There was one thing that remained the same each year, however. Every year at Christmas we would drive to my Nana and Grandad's in Peachland, BC, to celebrate with them and the rest of our family. Even when we lived as far away as Texas we would drive the 4 day trip out there just to spend the holidays with them. It was the constant in my life. Every year it was the same: we would see my Nana and Grandad, my uncle David and his kids, my Aunt Leslie and her kids, and before he passed my Uncle Glen and his kids. We ate rumballs every year and always played balderdash. I would stare at all my Nana's english decor: the painting of the English soldier, the statuesque head on her shelf, and the metranome that sat on her piano. We would play in their backyard looking at birds and running around with their dogs. Every year we would come back to it...to them.
I have deep scars, and it bothers me that to this day that I don't have my child hood places to return to. I don't have the house I grew up in, the park where I first kissed a boy, the school yard where we ice skated for recess or the church where I first met the Lord. I can't show my children any of that. What I did have though, was my family. This year though, things have changed. Earlier this year I lost my grandma, then in November I lost my Grandad, and earlier this week I lost my Uncle David. I can't describe how strange it feels to be losing my family because to me it seems like so much more than that. It isn't just my family...it is my childhood. They are the only people and memories I had every single year outside of my own mom, dad and sister.It is as if my history is dissapearing before my very eyes.
I struggle with these thoughts yet I know I shouldn't. I know the Lord has blessed me with a new family. New memories to make and new places to visit. I know the things of this earth are simply that: things! As much as I know that, it is still hard. I guess I just needed a venting post to let these thoughts out. I don't normally blog about anything other than adoption, haha as I'm sure most of you are aware of, but today I felt like switching it up. Perhaps God is giving me a tiny glimpse of what so many of the children who come into my house must feel, moving from foster home to foster home, never living in the same place, and having complete histories unknown. I only pray that our home can be the last stop for these children and that a new history can begin for them!

Hello Blog!

Hello!! It sure has been a while since my last post! Our family was hit hard with a horrible cold that was going around. We were all down for a week and a half, and just when I thought I was getting better it turned into a severe ear infection! I still can't hear out my ear (which makes for an interesting time when 5 kids are all trying to talk to you!)

Last week we had one of our adoption support groups, and as always it was great fun! We were all chatting about the recent closure of the only Christian Adoption Agency in our province and started to half joke about starting our own adoption agency one day. As some of you may know I am currently enrolled in school to become a social worker, and somehow the tiny little joking comment hit me. The very reason I wanted to become a social worker was to somehow offer free homestudy's whenever possible for the adoption process, to help with the mounting adoption fees that parents currently face. I was thinking small. This new idea however, has made me inspired! Why couldn't we open up an adoption agency? We are all passionate adoption advocates and I will talk about adoption any chance I get! I don't know. I am only thinking out loud at this moment. I wouldn't even know where to begin to do such a thing, although I am sure through the next few years as I work on my social work degree that I will make a lot of great contacts in the adoption community through our adoption ministry and such. For now one step at a time, and I will wait to hear what the Lord calls me to do, but I am definitely intrigued. It has definitely got me thinking! There are just soooo many days where I wish I could do more. I wish I could advocate for every child out there. I wish I had a powerful preaching ability to convince more people to adopt. I wish the process for adoption was so much smoother for those enduring it. I wish these poor, innocent children were not in need of a home in the first place! Such a large problem we as Christians are responsible for, and I know sometimes it can feel overwhelming, but one day at a time and one little step at a time and I know huge changes will occur! Praying each and every day for the cause of the orphan, and for all of God's children to know the love of a forever family!

A Home for Every Child

Hi everyone! Our ministry, A Hom for Every Child, now has a facebook page! Please come and like us today and keep up-to-date on new events, support groups, adoption stories and more! Thanks for looking!

Adoption Survey

Would you consider taking a few minutes to answer this short survey on adoption? Help our ministry A Home for Every Child in discovering what people really think so that we might better support those in our community! Thanks!